Home on the range

Another week has gone by in the home of supersizing, but progress has slowed markedly for the dorrian advance party - or at least one half of it. Kira has got a job and several auditions, and is apparently considering a run for congress. I have been sitting on my ass (that's butt not donkey - trying to assimilate so the natives won't suspect anything) eating burgers and gaining weight. With my fast balding pate I will soon look like Homer Simpson - all I need is a touch of jaundice to round off the transformation.

Obviously this can't last - unless I get hit by a truck. Then I can sue, win big, and sit in watching cable for the rest of my natural life... Woo hooo, the American Dream! Thankfully this is quite a strong possibility as public transport in Issaquah (the suburb we're staying in currently) doesn't really exist, so I'll need to cycle to get anywhere near an efficient mode of transportation to downtown Seattle (about 15 miles away). With a combination of my ineptitude, lack of cycle lanes and lack of street lighting, the big pay off should be anyday now... watch this space!

More seriously, I am considering calling off the invasion. Many of you will be saddened by this I know, but the thing is I suspect we have been beaten to it. A British stooge is already running the Country - and he's not even doing it secretly!

I am, of course, referring to Barack Obama. If he is not British I will eat my bowler hat! The evidence is all there: The concern for universal health care combined with the lack of a plan to properly pay for it; The shame about past invasions of other countries tempered with the decision to not bring the perpetrators to book or make reparations; the visible lack of a firearm; Speeches that don't end with a "yee-haw!"; and finally, though this is difficult to see without a massive american TV, if you look very carefully beneath his nose you can see evidence of a stiff upper lip.

With the invasion on hold, Kira and I decided to take ourselves away for the weekend (our 5th Wedding Anniversary). We went to a lovely getaway called Whidbey Island, and stayed in a log cabin. It was utterly beautiful and a lovely relaxing time away after all the moving stress. Pictures of the cabin - and of Kit, our wonder car.







We spent most of the time in the hot tub or the swimming pool - and didn't feel guilty for it at all!

The relaxation will serve us well as Kira and I are about to take part in a major sporting event (stop laughing!) - the 2009 Couples Decathlon. Full details are available at www.couplesdecathlon.com - but I'll start by telling you it will involve us playing volleyball (not really a sport for hobbits). Don't worry, there will be video evidence.

Lastly, two significant additions have been made this week - our iphones! I am not going to put the numbers here but will email them to anyone who wants them. If you have a VOIP (voice over internet phone) this is particularly good, as the technology can't tell the difference between US landlines and mobiles, so you can call for free!

Hope you are all well wherever you are!

DD