Sleepless in Seattle (oh yes I did!!)

I'm having trouble sleeping, so thought I'd fire off a quick blog post - a lot of material this week!

First and foremost - the invasion is back on... for so many reasons!

Number one: the people here are crying out for democracy, but they are being denied it by the ruling class. Last year's election was indeed free and fair, with UN observers praising advances since the fiasco of 2000, but it turns out the idea that the previous regime would share power was simply too optimistic. They are prepared to go to any lengths to hold onto it - including subverting the democratic process.

Take, for example, the case of Senator Joe Lieberman. Polls show that most of the country want a public option in healthcare, most of the senate and house are prepared to vote for a bill with a public option in it - and that portion of the senate should include good ol' Joe. However, Joe has decided that he will side with the Republicans in a filibuster.

For those of you who didn't take Politics 101, a filibuster is the action of continuously debating a bill so that it never comes to vote. It is a practice started by Cato the Younger in the Roman Senate. Cato would hide under the bed and wait for Julius Caesar to return before attempting to attack him... no, wait, that's a different Cato... THIS Cato would talk and talk until nightfall so the Senate could not complete its business.

The practice hasn't changed much in 2000 years - it still involves pompous assholes enjoying the sound of their own voices as they seek their own ends rather than the furtherance of the democratic process. After all, what can be more undemocratic than denying a vote?

Answer - Joe Lieberman. As Joe should have guaranteed that the Senate be of a complexion where filibusters can't occur (i.e. Democrats have too much of a majority). However, despite the fact that most of his constituents support a public option, and that his state already has a public option, Joe is siding with the Republicans. Why? His state is also home to most of the big insurance companies - so it seems some constituents are more equal than others...

And I'm not even going to get into the fact that Health Insurance companies have largely decided to base themselves in a State that has a public option for them and their employees...

So, regime change is desparately needed to bring back democracy to this region. Not least because they have stockpiled large numbers of weapons of mass destruction.


Number Two: They are desperate for British culture here, but can't quite get it right. Evidence for this is found in my trip to the 'local' pub last night. First, it's not local. It took me an hour to get there on the bus (which is not red nor double-decker). Then, when I got there it was more like a shack than a proper pub building - and clearly used to have saloon doors, which they'd replaced with full-sized ones. The game was streamed via the internet (dodgy satellite anyone?), so kept slowing down when the download speed dropped. even the team was wrong - it was Arsenal but in a parallel universe where Bendtner and Senderos start; though the Liverpool team did seem normal. On the plus side the score was right (2-1 to the gunners) and they serve the first decent on-tap lager I've had here, but the chants...

One wannabe gooner chanted "We are the Arsenal, We are from WEST London", and the main chant of the evening was "Who likes Arsenal? We do". I mean, do they not know that you are supposed to watch Arsenal in total silence?! In fairness, even the local teams have trouble with chants (at the sounders they flash them up on a screen bouncing ball style) - but that is something an invasion could remedy!

The final insult came in the gents at the end of the night - where a whole wall was plastered with Man U posters. I have been to pubs all over the UK, including many in Manchester, and I have never seen a single Man U poster that wasn't posted ironically as a dart board. We can't let this stand...


Number Three: You guys need somewhere to send Nick Griffin before this BNP thing gets out of hand. Luckily he'll find lots of like-minded people over here in the 'real' America.

For example, the Pope extended his invitation to Anglicans to come and join the Catholic Church this week - specifically Anglicans who are angry at the elevating of female and gay clergy to Bishophood.

It is much too easy to say that this is just misogyny and homophobia as a whole - there are theological issues that aren't being effectively addressed, so anger occurs at the feeling that belief is being eroded.

However, if Anglicans are prepared to change to the Catholic Church, because of these issues, then they are homophobic and misogynist - as it clearly isn't about belief anymore. And the Pope must think he has an audience here...

He's probably right. This attack ad against legal protection for gay partnerships (i.e. allowing things like hospital visits with a partner) ran recently in Washington State;

"Did you know that in 2004 Scandinavia passed a law legalising same sex marriage. In the same year suicides rose by 25% and illegal drug use rose by 19%"

Wow. How do you counter that? Another argument about subsequence and consequence?

Nothing so subtle. As Stephen Colbert (a very funny pundit over here) pointed out - the ad is flawed because; 1) There is no such country as Scandinavia; 2) None of the countries in Scandinavia passed a same-sex marriage law in 2004; 3) The statistics about suicide and drug use are completely made up.

So, intolerance supported by false information - sounds like the perfect busman's holiday for Griffin. Maybe it won't even take an invasion - we could call him out in the same way that the Pope is calling out intolerant anglicans! "Dear Nick, Please feel free to come to 'real america' if you get sick of acceptance and multiculturalism in the UK. We're WASPs too! You would have to pledge allegiance to our flag... but on the plus side it is red white and blue..."


Number Four: They are trying to invade us! Time for a pre-emptive strike!

Evidence of this is seen in the recent NFL London game - 85,000 Yanks in Wembley! It's not right I tell you! And now they want two games a year!!

You can also see it in Pop Culture. They are just about to release The Boat That Rocked over here (did ANYONE watch it in the UK??) and have rebranded it Pirate Radio, with the tag-line "When the British Government banned Rock n Roll, One American DJ took them on". What?!? So Radio Luxembourg was made up of one American DJ was it?!? What is this, a Mel Gibson movie? Bravecast? "You can take our stones, but you'll never take our Beatles!"???

They are clearly readying an advance party and we need to strike first.


Rant over

DD out